I am Depressed again.?

Hi, I am almost 21 yrs old and there is not a day that goes by that I don't think about hurting myself. Whether its cutting or actually doing it! I have always been this way since I can remember... I am extremely unhappy right now. I crashed my car about month ago I haven't been getting hours at work. I still live at home. I have no true friends. I am in college but slowly I am losing my ambition.. I need a scenery change and don't know how or am to scared to pick myself up and freaking go. I just want to find what I am suppose to be doing with my life right now. I need more direction. My parents wont help me. No one will. Also nothing makes me happy anymore. I don't feel like talking to ppl ever or doing something productive. I hate being alone but Im not fun anymore and I don't have really much to talk about! How do I pick myself up?